Going home!

PRAISE GOD FROM WHOM ALL BLESSINGS FLOW

We have a plan. We have a destination. We have an answer - and the answer, the destination, the plan did not come from anything that we did! Those are the best answers, aren't they?

I have been racking my brain and resources trying to find a way that we could live on one salary - either here in San Antonio or in Houston - and have continuously come up empty. I would find what I thought to be a solution, would get SO excited, and then within a day or two would find out that what I thought was the answer was no answer at all. We have lived these past couple of months with the reality that we can't afford to stay in our current home - and with no obtainable plan for the future. I was at the point of looking for dwellings in dangerous neighborhoods that we had no business stuffing a family of 7 into - but could afford to live in at least until this baby arrives and I can go back to work - but even then I was coming up empty. I was at a complete loss. It has been an emotional roller coaster that I have been more than ready to jump off of!

Well our answer came this weekend with no prompting or planning or research of my own! Just plop down into our lap at church on Sunday morning we received God's answer in the form of a very wonderful friend. I won't go into too many of the details but we have an arrangement where we will rent a friend's 4 bedroom home (1000+ more sq ft than where we currently live) for a very low price! Our friend will continue to use his garage space (and whatever else he wants as far as I'm concerned!) but will move into an apartment so that we can have the house. Who does that? I would have NEVER in a million years come up with something like this - or put someone out and asked for them to do this. This has to be bigger than us.

In all honesty, the last year has been incredibly difficult for us (well - me). Don't get me wrong... we have been in the place we know we were supposed to be and have learned amazing life lessons! But sometimes lessons aren't easy and the test is even harder. The trials of this past year have left me burned out and depressed. I never realized how important friendships and church family were until we had neither. I am so thankful though for the experience. We are walking (ok - maybe I'm running) away from this experience with new understanding and respect for the need we have to form relationships with other adult couples. We have also grown tremendously as a family. We have learned to really rely on each other in the good and bad. Because we had no distractions or entertainment of other families we have also learned to really play together. Our kids have changed in amazing ways - each one differently - but we know in ways that would not have happened if we had not jumped out of our comfort zone and taken this journey together.

I am still reeling from the news of this new living arrangement and completely flabbergasted and humbled that God would work something like this out for US. For ME. It's not that I don't believe that He can do ANYthing... I just don't think it should be done for me. I know that even if we were to live in a van down by the river - God is still God and would still be providing for us. It just might not be in the way others would imagine. He has provided for us here - in our home situation, in our family situation, and financially (sometimes through other people). It's not always easy - but He always gets us through. I never could have asked for something like He is providing in Houston. My tiny human brain cannot comprehend the blessing.

I keep hearing the chorus of "Home" in my head... though the words I hear are a little different than originally written:

Well, I'm going home, back to the place where I belong
And where their love has always been enough for me
I'm not running from, no, I think you got it all wrong
I don't regret this life You chose for me
But these places and these faces are getting old
So we're going home, we're going home

I cannot wait to be "home" with our friends, family, and church home. I'm looking forward to the healing that will come (in time) and seeing where God leads us. I'm also praying that we stay out of our old comfort zone and continue to grow as a family and as followers of Christ.