Leaps and Bounds

This has been a great week for Mateo and [dare I say it] I feel like we are making progress! For those who don't know- here is a VERY brief (or at least I will try to make it brief) story of Mateo. Mateo has always been a little bit different- we just described him as Mateo- and it was fine. But around the time he turned four, things started to get worse. He was attending The Lamb School and for the most part he was very happy there. The problems started to show in various odd ways. For example- when he began The Lamb School at 3 years old (older three) he drew very detailed pictures of people... stick figures with heads, faces, arms, legs and even toes and fingers. Gradually though, instead of growing in detail over the next two years, they shrank. By the end of age four they no longer had hands/fingers, feet/toes, or even faces. At the end of age five he wouldn't draw people at all. Change became more and more difficult for him and his obsessions were more significant (he wouldn't remove his socks... EVER, he had to wear long pants and long sleeves, he wore one glove, etc) These obsessions were not your normal- kid throwing a tantrum- kind of thing... he physically/emotionally/mentally could not function if these things were out of place. He started kindergarten in 2007 and it became a horrible struggle to get him to school. He doesn't like loud noises or crowds- so the bus stopped being an option. He complained that he had no friends and that school was boring. In November of 2007 things came to a head when he was bawling that he hated his life and wanted to die. He was 6 years old. He said over and over that no one liked him and that he didn't like himself. It was the most heartbreaking thing I have ever experienced. We had already been seeing a child psychologist so I kept him home from school the next day and we went straight to the doctor. Many visits later the doctor diagnosed him with Asperger's Syndrome. We finished out the school year with no progress [don't get me started on the school's lack of response]. Mateo's teacher- who was NOT part of the problem... she's great- said the kids all loved him (and I witnessed this myself in the classroom and on the field trip) but Mateo couldn't see it. In his eyes they hated him. We spent the summer hanging out as a family and honestly ignoring the upcoming year. I was so dreading it that I pushed the thought from my mind. Little did I know (though I should have never doubted God's abilities) everything was working out. Mateo's Kinder teacher had put in a special request for Mateo to be clustered with a wonderful teacher. OH- one fabulous thing about Mateo (there are many!) is that he has incredible math skills. At the age of 6 he knew how to add and subtract negative numbers, could subtract double digits and could multiply certain numbers. No one taught him these skills- they are just in his brain. SO... school does not excite him very much. He found kindergarten boring and said that he already knew all of that stuff... which he did. Mateo's new teacher is also wonderful. She has been very accommodating with Mateo and is intrigued by his skills. After a massive breakdown the second or so week at school - Mateo didn't want to go to school so I left him with the counselor... he eventually went running out of the school trying to escape and hid twice in a crawl space in her office- I was scheduled for an emergency meeting with the Problem Solving Team. I had tried to get one of these meetings all last year! Here it was the second week of school and I had one scheduled! YAY! The school agreed not to pursue labeling him with Asperger's (at my request) and we agreed on a plan of action to help him not only make it through school but to excel academically (never been a problem) and SOCIALLY. His teacher helps him on the playground by initiating conversations between Mateo and his classmates. He is allowed to go and sit in the front office every morning when he arrives at school so that he doesn't have to endure the noisy crowded cafeteria. His teacher is putting together special math "tasks" to tap into those crazy skills that he has. Mateo has a new therapist and is really responding well to him. Just before IKE he did have another breakdown but since IKE things have been smooth! He has attended Sunday School and Kid's Worship 2 Sundays in a row (he hadn't gone to these in over a year) and on Saturday- HE WENT TO A FRIEND'S HOUSE TO PLAY! There have been HUGE barriers broken which have led to GREAT progress for Mateo. The fact that he calls someone his friend is HUGE. The icing on the cake was tonight. Mateo never really gets excited about anything- or at least he never admits it. He is very straight lined emotionally- except for the extreme sadness (rare) or the fits of anger. (Don't get me wrong though- he is often FULL of energy and VERY funny!) He often speaks in a very monotone voice and I'm overjoyed when he responds with "a little" when questioned if something was fun. He has not attended many birthday parties in the last 3 years because of the noise and people but his new friend invited him to a party next weekend- and Mateo said yes! Tonight he asked me if it was the weekend yet (even though he knew it wasn't) and I said no- why? He first said "I was just wondering..." but then he stopped and said, "I'm excited. I'm excited about the party." It was a great moment.

This really was a VERY short version of the last 4 years with Mateo... I promise!

One specific example of his math skills: We were watching E.T. on television and Christopher wanted to know how old the movie was. We looked on the information and saw that it was released in 1982. Christopher said- so how old is it? Chris is 11 and very intelligent so I wanted him to figure it out for himself. I said, "Well Chris, it came out in 1982. This is 2008. How old is it?" He didn't really try and just said- I don't know. My mom asked Mateo, "Mateo, how old is it?" Mateo promptly responded, "26 years." Hahaha He just turned 7.